Thursday morning

Today, I'm trying to work through the ordinary things of housekeeping. I'm sad, of course. I just made a pot of coffee. I've made thousands of pots of coffee before, but Danny was our Numero Uno coffee maker here. He had a knack for making the richest, most delicious coffee you've ever tasted. Every family gathering we went to, he was asked to make it. As often as possible, he made it for us here at home. I'm a tolerable coffee maker, but will never make it to taste as his did.

I'm working at tidying the kitchen this morning. It's not bad. The kids did pretty good while I was up at Mama's after the funeral. Still needs some tweaking, though.

Brandon tried on some of his Daddy's button-up shirts last night, hoping he could use them. They are too small. But he may be able to use some of the larger colored tee-shirts. He likes to wear tees under his button-ups. He can also wear some of the PJ bottoms, so he'll go through those to make sure what he can make use of.

Over the next day or so, I'm going to pack and store Danny's other clothes. I'm not ready to let go of them completely yet - eventually I will be and I'll pass them along to someone who can make good use of them. For now, I'll put them in a tote, mark it, and store it in the back corner of the closet.

I've bagged up all the hospital type stuff - the sheets, the gowns, the disposable stuff. Most was given to us by Danny's family members and I'd love to give what's left back to them. Just don't know how at the moment. So I'll bag it up, label the bag, and hope that soon it can be returned to them in case someone over there needs it in the future.

I'll be looking for a small "treasure chest" to put Danny's more personal items in, too. Keepsakes, mementos, what he carried in his pockets, things like that. I've seen some I like at local stores and as soon as I have the extra money, I'll get one.

Because of the generosity of others, I was able to meet every bill this month. I have a few dollars left for other things. For instance, I will need to renew my driver's license this month and if the van is fixed soon, I'll need to renew the tags on it. I have enough for that. In the meantime, I'll be working on Ebay and also trying to round up other sources of income. I believe God will supply those sources at the time I need them. He hasn't failed me in the past, and I don't expect He's abandoned me now.

All the appropriate persons have been told of Danny's passing - Social Security, Medicaid. We have one vehicle that is in his name only (the aforementioned van) and I'll need to present his death certificate when I renew the tags so it can be switched to my name. I'm still waiting on the death certificate to come in the mail, but right now there's no rush.

The kids had put away the Christmas tree and decorations by the time I got home, so I didn't have that to face. We need to burn some trash, but our state has a burn ban nearly statewide now so that's out of the question. For now, I'll just bag it and put it where we burn it. If the Lord provides it, I'll probably start getting trash pickup so that we don't encounter this problem again. For now, though, we just have to deal with it the best way we can.

Hospice came by and picked up the bed, oxygen pump, suction pump, and spare oxygen tank a couple of days ago. Now the bedroom looks very empty. I don't plan to set up the full size bed in there as the mattress and springs are worn out anyway. They have been in bad shape long before Danny got sick. I'll be looking for a twin bed to go in there. That will give me more room to use for Ebay shelves and possibly even set up my sewing machine in there.

Right now, I can only think of one thing at a time when it comes to doing my housework. Today, the kitchen weighs heaviest on me I think. It's the heart and soul of our home, it seems, so I want it comfortable and in good order.

Thank you and God bless you to all who have prayed and cried, sent cards and gifts, and lifted us up when we could not do it for ourselves. I know God has a blessing set aside just for you.